Top 2010 inventions

The unofficial top 10 inventions for 2010:

At number 10)
The no-hands needed umbrella


9)
The underwear&jeans Jeans


8)
The lipstick template


7)
Easy to access tissue dispenser


6)
Dustpan and brush shoes


5)
Butterstick


4)
Food cooler


3)
Portable office tie


2)
Flip Flop drinks container


And the top 2010 inventon is:

The plunger stuck to a helmet to prevent your head dropping when you sleep on public transport!


The Japanese have thought of everything!

Spy holes

I thought the whole purpose of a spy hole was to be able to spy on whoever's outside, without them knowing you're in.



This makes me wonder why some front doors have spy holes even when the door has glass windows? It's hardly spying when the person outside can see you clearer than you can see them...
If you had a slim rectangular body maybe it would work but i'm yet to come across a person with a rectangular head. You'd also have to walk up to the door directly central which could be difficult.

Spy holes on glass doors are a FAIL if you ask me.

Canned foods

I received a special request for a blog about chicken in a can.

Yes, a whole chicken in a can.

If you're feeling intrigued and brave, here's a video that might settle some of that curiosity.

Unfortunately i couldn't find the price for chicken in a can, but to be honest i don't think it will cost much judging by the look of it.

Whilst on the subject, i've collected a few more unusual canned foods:






Ok, the last product might not be true......yet.
Dedicated to Fran.

Wonderbra Spiral Viral

I've only just come across this viral ad from 2008:

Pretty cool use of illusions.

Human Chicken

Have you ever got really annoyed because you seem to be the only person on the street that's making an effort to move out of the way of oncoming people?

It can annoy me so much that i decide i'm no longer going to move for people just like they aren't for me. Human Chicken.
There's the car version, the doorbell version and now, the walking version.

The problem is, when i play human chicken, both the opposition and myself will be equally stubborn so we'll actually collide. When this happens i automatically feel like i have to say sorry even though it's a shared responsibility. I'd also just like to point out that the worst culprits for not moving on a street are elderly people and couples. So much so, they'd prefer you to walk around them on the road into oncoming traffic. Since when was there a hierarchy of who deserves to stay alive and safe on the path?

This is what found when i typed 'human chicken' into google...

Periods

This might be a bit too much for the faint hearted but i can't help wonder:

When a woman says 'I can't stand the sight of blood, the slightest drop makes me faint'... it makes me wonder what do they do every month?
Across the world there would thousands of women passed out on the floor, underwear half way down their legs. It's unavoidable.

You know when you're queueing in public toilets, and that one toilet never opens...it's always locked no matter how long your there, even when you come out of your toilet and you wash your hands, maybe dry them, re-apply make-up, brush your hair. No matter how long you take it's still locked...well maybe that's why! The cubicle probably has a woman face down on the floor pantless!

Holidays are coming

Following the Christmas themed blog before....
You know that it's officially time to start thinking about Christmas when you see this advert on TV:



Like a lot of people i saw it for the first time a couple nights ago. Twitter and Facebook had comment after comment of excited people.
It's such an iconic advert that marks the beginning of the festive season for so many people. There will be a brand new advert from the 13th December with a slightly fresher approach:

Advent calendars

First of all, i don't think you can ever be too old for an advent calendar. It makes the 24 days before christmas managable.

Secondly, how can some advent calanders have the cheek to end on the 24th! They should at least get to their target.

Thirdly, i hate it when the days aren't jumbled up, if you see an advent calendar next to yours that has been opened the whole fun of searching for the number is ruined.

Fourthly, the 25th day should have an extra special chocolate, not just a reef saying 'Merry Xmas'. It's on its own line so there's plenty of space.

And finally, it's the best moment when you realise you've missed 3 days and have to catch up.

YouTube ads

Why are YouTube putting ads EVERYWHERE.

They put an ad before you watch a youtube video and then put a crappy little banner on the screen your watching! I dont mind it once, but its everytime you play a video. It isn't the most strategic place to put an ad, it just pisses people off. There's a difference between advertising and invading.

Rape References

Rape seems to be losing it's seriousness.
The phrase is not only used on the social network site Facebook coined 'frape' but now 'twape' on twitter has been created.
Not only this, but the word rape is used in everyday situations such as when somebody is particularly close to you. You may say 'all right mate, you don't have to rape me'... I for one am guilty of overusing the word in a joking manner.

A recent news story in the US last month about a man breaking into a woman's bedroom and 'trying it on' shortly became the centre of a rape joke due to an eccentric brother of the victim named Antoine Dodson.







Two men saw this story and have made an entertaining music video starring Antoine, his exaggeration of the situation has become a world wide hit with over 36 million views and that's all within just one month.








As you can see, the seriousness of the initial story has become a bit of a joke due to the overuse of the word rape.
To be honest i feel like there should be a moral to this story to round of my post but, there isn't. All i'm saying is in the last few years rape has become a household phrase, despite the seriousness of the actual offence. I don't necessarily think it's a bad thing but obviously in no way is it a good thing either. Technology and especially social networks have desensitised us from the harsh realities of the REAL world.

Constipational Diving

Just came across these whilst searching for some images at work.

I think they are worthy of being on my blog:









No offense to the divers, but they do look constipated. Not the most glamorous action shots.

Apples

It may seem like i have a bit of a chip on my shoulder (which i do) but i hate the Apple brand. I think it's overrated and a cult. If you by one apple product everything you own has to follow. If it doesn't have an 'i' infront of it, it wont work.
My hatred began at University. I have a Sony laptop, which at the time of purchase was the same as a Mac. For some reason my laptop was slated by some Mac owners as if Windows was primitive...

I understand that some Apple products are probably offereing some of the best features within the market, however i wouldn't say it was leaps and bounds ahead of any other make. It's just another brand except it has a fruit symbol. Some Apple products are holding back technologcal advances, for example Apple released the iPod as a product without a simple feature like a camera and then a couple months down the line re-release it with the 'new innovative feature'. Their iPhone 3G doesn't even have a flash.
Since when did PC's become dated? They still have the same features and offerings. If anything they offer more, more choice, more programmes, more prices, more makes, more styles, more colours... and not to mention a right click.

I've found that some people get a Mac and are suddenly hypnotised by a little piece of fruit. Half eaten...! They walk around with their Macs like they're the coolest thing since sunglasses. Well fruit isn't cool. If i was to stick an apple on this would people buy it? Probably.


New iPoo, available from only £149.99


If you don't get what i'm saying then just watch this instead. I expect there's already some kind of waiting list.





Regrettably, this post was written on an Apple computer.
If you have an Apple good for you BUT i'm a PC person.

Red Sweets

It's a well known fact that red sweets are more than likely going to be the best tasting. Skittles, Starburst, Haribo(not including eggs), Refreshers etc.

This leads me to ask, why is the ratio of red sweets to other colours always less!? Everytime i have Skittles, because i eat them in specific colour order (save the best for last), there's always half the amount of reds to yellow. The same happens with a packet of Starburst or Fruit Pastels.
People don't buy sweets for the yellow ones! If i was a sweet manufacturing company i would exploit this fact and sell packets full of only red sweets. I'd be a millionaire!

The most irritating game in the world

If you really want to annoy someone do this:

Tell them to breath.
If you get them to focus on their breathing 'in and out', 'in and out' they'll have to do it manually and it's a hard thing to forget about. Once you've got them hooked they'll be stuck concentrating on their breathing, HAHA!
Try a line like 'Don't forget to breath!'

Unfortunately this post has backfired on me, whilst i've been writing this post i've been struggling to subconsciously breath, but hopefully so are you from reading this.

Graffiti

Who said 'all graffiti is rubbish'....

Coughing in public

When people cough in small spaces everything becomes amplified. Because there's nothing else to focus on, you end up focussing on the cough and start imagining little germs spreading from their mouth.
Some people (including me) focus so much on the germ situation, they decide that the logical thing to do is to hold your breath for a certain amount of time so the germs will vanish, therefore you won't breath them in. This is all very well, until you start to go red in the face and begin to get strange looks. Or, there's one cough, you start to hold your breath and then there is another. Now, you're pretty screwed. Do you risk cathching a possible cold or risk self-suffocation?
Imagine ending up in hospital explaining to a Doctor that you're there because you decided to hold you're breath for too long after someone coughed and suffocated yourself.

Another option for preventing the germ intake is blowing out with your 'nose air' or through the side of your mouth. This might be a safer option but can't always be successful. To get the 'nose air' you need to breath in a decent amount. If you manage to do this the theory is it will push the germs away from your breathing space, thus creating fresher air to breath in.

I think i have issues.

Unfair lesbian assumptions.

Because I'm too busy enjoying my Hot Chocolate delight, I shall pass you over to my new copywriting buddy Britton (Brittony Collins)

So... as it's Friday Vicky and I decided to waltz on down to the coffee shop and get ourselves a hot chocolate. But I think the woman at the counter mistook Vicky for a lesbian and gave her a free LARGE hot chocolate with a caramel syrup shot. I personally think that this is appauling as my hot chocolate was half the size and I payed for it! And my double chocolate muffin (that I searched in three different coffee shops for) tasted like orange.



I am disappointed and quite frankly disturbed by this woman.
Vicky however, is now considering lesbianism.

Wine

There's white, there's red and there's rose. Sometimes pronounced like the flower by inexperienced rose drinkers.

White - the easy choice but can get a bit much. It starts off nice but for some reason always gets worse as you progress further down the bottle.

Red - difficult to find a good red, a lot of knowledge and experience needed, looks more sophisticated but results in black lips.

Rose - my personal favourite, a great middle ground. Not only does the title make you feel classy - in a look at me im speaking french way - it's also the safest taste-wise.

Rose seems to be slowly dominating the wine front as more and more University females discover it. I've heard the discrimintion against Rose, 'C'mon! Choose a team!' but there will always be a place for Rose in my heart/stomach.

Teen books

When i was 11 i started reading Louise Rennison's book series aimed at young teenage girls. 11 years ago i wasn't planning ahead, i didn't realise by choosing this one book i'd still be buying them when i was 22. The final book in the series was published last year and i have just got round to buying it.It's quite embarassing walking into a book shop at 22 and finding yourself hunting for books in the teen fiction section.
I had to come up with a cunning plan this time, i said 'my niece loves these books'. I have no niece, but im pretty sure the man at the till believed me. Usually i end up buying 2 adult books to sandwich the teen book and hope it will confuse the checkout operator.

Anyway, i look forward to moving on with my life as soon as this book has been finished.

Cobs

When i moved North to Mansfield one of the hardest things to adapt to was the 'cob'. This is a Midland's term for the bread roll. It has absolutely no ressemblance to the word roll what so ever.
If i asked for a roll, i'd just get a blank stare as if i were speaking Spanish. Even sandwiches are called 'cobs' - to me that's just laziness. I tried to defend the bread roll by explaining that on packets of rolls it is titled '4 white bread rolls'. In return i once had the reply that rolls were a dessert 'one of those long things with icing on'.

This is a quote from Wikipedia that all 'cob' people should read:

'Cob, a word often incorrectly associated with bread rolls by Midlands students studying English...' Why studying English i don't know but either way it proves bread roll is correct!

As for breadcake..... that's easy - cake, bread? Which is it? Bread.

Before the internet

It's hard to imagine what life would be like without internet, especially now that we are completely reliant on it. In school, the closest we got to typing in random key words and recieving information was Encarta.


Microsofts Digital Multimedia Encyclopedia. Enacarta even exists now!

If the Internet was to suddenly disappear i wonder what the back-up plan would be. Would we go back to Encarta, start using Libraries? I think that i'd struggle most with no e-mailing or google images. Not only does the Internet save me money - less stamps, but it also saves me huge amounts of time! I don't need to walk to letterboxes every day or flick through thousands of books looking for images.

This is a toast to the intenet!

(i've never had to spell toast before but i can assure you that this is the correct spelling)

Disney or Gremlins

When i was a child i used to watch all the disney classics, Snow White, The Lion King, Cinderella, Peter Pan etc. Disney are known for sugar coating stories to make them more 'happy ever after' resulting in happy children when the films finish.

Around the same age i was also watching Gremlins, ET, Neverending Story and The Labyrinth. You cannot compare these films to Disney films, they should be rated 15+. Now, as a result of my parents lack of responsibilty i'm a damaged adult. I cannot watch these films.

I could watch Saw or Alien, but Gremlins NOOOOO! If i see a toy Gizmo i have a sudden rush of fear and basically run to the nearest lit area. If i see a statue either side of me i expect its eyes to open and fire death rays at me. A pile of stuffed animals make me brace myself for an alien to pop out and chase me around the house saying 'ET PHONE HOME' over and over.


On a completely seperate note, i used to think Disney was Disnep because of the logo.

JLS Condoms

Just
Love
Safe




Whilst i think this is a good idea, i cant help find it not so good at the same time. It's weird to think people will be more persuaded to use condoms if a boyband are on the packet... Also whilst it has good intentions it may have the reverse effect and encourage sex to those underage. To an outsider you can see it's encouraging safe sex but to a devoted fan it's saying buy these, they're cool and so is sex.

Jeans

Jeans are so common, every clothing shop sells a pair. It's probably one of the hardest things for a woman to shop for, it's frustrating and one of those things you have to try on before buying. I don't know one woman that has the perfect fitting jeans, there's always size issues, muffin tops, gaping holes in the back, saggy bums, ankle biters...

Levi's are taking advantage of this insight:

'Text by Dazed Digital
Facing the age-old trouble of finding a jean that fits, Levi's has taken the wardrobe staple and attempted to work out its problems using the Curve ID theory taking a woman's measurements to ensure a perfect fit. After conducting a study, Levi's had found that a massive 87 per cent of women wanted better fitting jeans than the ones they currently owned, hence the need for a new approach in creating a denim range that fits all women.

Utilising the ratio between the measurements between the narrowest and widest parts of the hips, the jeans are made with a stretchy denim available in light to dark washes. Shot by Peter Lindbergh, the three spokespersons Swedish singer Lykke Li, Miss Nine and Pixie Geldof front the campaign for the new range representing the three fits of 'Slight', 'Demi', and 'Bold'.

Dazed Digital: What was the initial inspired this project?
Consumers. This journey of the Curve ID took a year to do. We decided let's go talk to women and find out their current relationship with jeans and their relationship with Levi's - and we found a lot of frustration and we wondered why there was this frustation, and basically women found a difficulty in finding the right fit. Then came the research ideas, so the first surveys and research speaking to women took three months, then after the initial feedback, another six - nine months to perfect the fit.

DD: Do you think three shapes sufficiently embodies all women?
No. It accounts for 80 per cent of women, globally! We're now working on the fourth fit for next year.

DD: Is there scope for this range to expand or develop in the future?
In terms of body types we will be expanding our shapes and sizes but also within the same system of curves. This will be available in our current and more rises. What we currently have is the most popular rise in the market so this is why we're using this low rise.

DD: With all this emphasis on 'curve', will this alienate 'uncurvy' girls?
You still have curve - but in proportion to your body! Depends on the conversation we have with women, part of the research with Curve ID is the shopping experience with women - why don't they feel good when they say you have a flat butt or thunder hips, but all women are curved, period, point. It just depends on your build. You don't have to change to fit the jeans, but the jeans fit you.'

Soon, we might all live in a world wear jeans can be purchased at ease. All our jean dreams may come true and piles of jeans on changing room floors will be a distant memory.

Angry Animals

This is what blogs are made for.

Domain names

Why hasn't www.dotcom.com been created!?

I just typed it in and ... nothing. If i had the money to spend on buying new domain names i would and that would be the first one i'd buy. It's only a matter of time before it's gone. So much potential and so little time.

Pete versus Life

This is a brand new series on channel 4 that follows the life of struggling sports writer Pete Griffith, your everyday average guy. Whilst that may sound boring this programme is far from, his every move is observed by two commentators and analysed brutally.
It's refreshing to see a unique approach to a comedy series. I'd describe it as the Truman Show meets Friends... Okay, instead i'll just say it is sophisticated entertainment, with a great twist.

If you haven't watched it, give it a go: Friday nights at 10pm or 4od

Leg space on a train

Lately, i've been spending A LOT of time on trains. Like most people i try to get 2 seats to myself, but sometimes you can't keep hold of that extra 'seat for your bag'. Recently i had a reserved seat which was on a table.

I hate table seats when i'm travelling alone because:
It means your less likely to be alone as your sitting with 3 other people
You're facing someone directly, so it's hard to avoid any eye contact
You cant sit with your bag under your chair for easy access
as
their is limited leg room
and so
you have to lay all your travel belongings out on the table - in view of your other table sitters

Let me just highlight the limited leg room issue - Men seem to think women dont have legs. Not only do women have suffer with men sitting open legged constantly 'for comfort', but now we have to keep our legs tucked in awkwardly the whole journey as a man needs way over half of the leg space. If i was to draw the equal leg space allowance on the table, they would be way into my area...

Well, i have drawn it:


Here you can see how much room is theoretically allowed and the intursion into my personal leg allowance. And to top it all off, they kick your feet too!

(This is not aimed at all men - you know who you are!)

Handshakes

When you meet someone new it's always dificult to judge whether its a handshake moment or not. And, when it is a handshake situation, how much pressure do you apply? How many times do you physically shake your hands up and down? Do you even shake, or is it more of a warm grasp?



Handshake become even more difficult when it's mixed gender. If your the woman, you want to seem confident and strong but not to butch. A man wants to be professional, non-sexist but at the same time respect the 'lady'.

Things you should know about Handshakes(thanks to Wikipedia)
The earliest handshake dates back to 5th century BC.
Handshakes should always be made bare handed, in some customs it is considered inappropriate/derogatory behaviour if preformed whilst wearing gloves.
'It is considered to be in poor taste to show dominance with too strong a handshake conversely, too weak a handshake (sometimes referred to as a "limp fish" or "dead fish" handshake) is also considered unseemly due to people perceiving it as a sign of weakness.'
New Jersey Mayor Joseph Lazarow from Atlantic City was recognized by the Guinness Book of World Records for shaking more than 11,000 hands in a single day.
And just incase you were thinking of doing the longest ever handshake:
Matthew Rosen and Joe Ackerman hold a world record time of 15 hours, 30 minutes and 45 seconds.

Cats vs Dogs

1)Are you a cat person or dog person?

A cat person - Enjoys the quieter and lower maintanance pet. Seeks prettier, more aesthetically pleasing animals. Forms a bigger emotional bond with their pet, rather than physical.

A dog person - Wants a much more active pet, that will entertain themselves and an audience. Requires unconditional love and a strong physical bond between the person and pet.





2)Would you prefer to be a cat or a dog?

A cat - self sufficient, more ignorant, clean, sleeps at least 18 hours a day.

A dog - reliant, dirty, affectionate, smells, awake 11-14 hours a day.




My answers
Question 1) Cat person
Question 2) Cat

The Stereotype Info

'Cat people (like cats) are a little more mysterious, self-centered and independent, sometimes bordering on aloof; they are capable of entertaining themselves for hours on end, more tricky, more circuitous, more manipulative.' (John Woestendiek)

'Dog people (like dogs) are more prone to dominance and co-dependence, crave constant attention and are more open, outgoing, social and likely to drool.' (John Woestendiek)

"Many people perceive themselves as being either 'cat people' or 'dog people.' These people often think they relate to their pets because they share similar personalities."
This isn't necessarily true. Stereotypes are stereotypes.

Seasons - 'the change'

At certain points during the year we all have to make 'the change'. 'The change' happens when we think there has been a decrease or rise in temperature, meaning it's time to dress appropriately.

I like to refer to it as upgrading or downgrading. For example, if we've just endured the Winter, there comes a point when you must accept it's finished and the new season is approaching. You need to downgrade your coat.
The tricky thing is to pick the correct week. People fall under five categories during this period of time.

There are: The Risk Takers (these are the people that downgrade/upgrade far to early which usually results in them being caught out by the weather and being reffered to as 'a dick')
The Forcers (people that downgrade/upgrade a week or two after 'The Risk Takers', once they have waited for the weather to steady a bit more. They force themselves to make the change and never look back, can be quite intimidating towards 'The Sheep' and try to influence their change)
The Sheep (these people have watched 'The Forcers' make the change and wait just a few more days to be sure, this is the most popular category - i myself, fall into this one)
The Sceptics (very stubborn and pessimistic people, refuse to be one of 'The Sheep' so wait even longer before they make the change, usually resulting in some discomfort as the temperature rises/falls)
The Oblivious (the rarest category, these are the people that never seem to change and are always wearing the same seasons coat/raincoat/jacket/none, they are usually commented on by passers by - 'they must be freezing' or 'i bet they're boiling in that')



The official season has begun when The Sheep have made 'the change' as these are the majority of the population. The Forcers will try enforce the official season by saying things like 'It's Summer!' or 'Looks like Winters here', do no be fooled.

Heineken

2 great insights, 1 brilliant ad.

Scone or Scon?

Scone... How do you pronounce it? Well there is only one way it should be said.

If i say scone or scon? it becomes very clear which way it should be pronounced. If you pronounce it as scone, you are correct. If you say scon im afraid the proof is in the spelling.

Charlotte, if we ever do end up opening our bakery, we will not be serving any scons.

Expiry Dates

Apparently i am too obsessed with expiry dates. My Mum seems to think that an expiry date means nothing, if the food still holds its shape it's okay. I disagree.

I've done a bit of research into this subject a.k.a typing it in to Wikipedia and found out the following:

Expiry dates may also be known use by, display until and sell buy. All meaning the products cannot be sold after this date because they are no longer at best quality and have expired shelf life.

Now then, im not obsessed so much that i wont eat something after the expiration date, if it's a couple days i can cope, but months/years...no. I won't eat expired food for obvious reasons, taste and health. The argument last night however, was over medicinal expiration. I simply informed my mother the anticeptic cream was about 1 year over it's expiry date so probably wouldn't be as effective. I knew this because i'd had previous experience using expired paracetamol and anticeptic cream which hadn't worked. Once i used in date products it worked. This was my defence and proof that expiry dates are there for reason. She responded with 'it'll be fine, your too obsessed with the dates of things. They only put these dates on to make people like you use them faster an go buy more'.

Now even though this is a good business strategy, i think it's far from the truth. Whilst i agree that an expiry date doesn't necessarily mean the product is unusable, i also think expiration dates are legally there for a reason. If they did not exist people would probably get pretty ill. Expiry dates aren't just decorative digits, they save lives... This post is dedicated to my Mum.

McDonald's Collection Point

I went to McDonald's yesterday and encountered a very unusual experience. I ordered my food as normal but at the point of handing over change they said, 'your number is 173, if you'd like to make your way over to the collection point please'. What.....? I thought i was in argos.

It was so surreal to be standing in McDonald's with monitor above me flashing numbers. About 1 minute later 173 flashed on the screen so i walked back up to the counter 'the collection point' and collected my food.

I'm not sure if this is a new thing, or if this store was testing the idea, but watch this space and be prepared.

Dubbing

I keep seeing this annoying TV advert so it's time for a blog post on it. Neutrogena is a well established brand so i dont know why they cant afford to get their adverts dubbed correctly. Watch and you'll see what i mean:



She doesn't even pronounce all of the words... 'Now i can ....(?) goodbye the blackheads'

To me it just feels like it's laziness. There must be an excuse why some adverts do this, but i am yet to find out. For the time being i will remain annoyed and frustrated at these particular adverts. (There's a bit of a toiletry theme) Here's a few more:





My personal favourite Mr Muscle


Mr muscle advert
Uploaded by hamster1992. - Check out other Film & TV videos.

Car Faces

A lot of people describe cars to have faces. This is how i come to an aesthetical decision about the style of a car and whether i like it or not. My Dad however thinks im slightly mad for doing this?? I dont know if it's a male thing, or just people with less imagination that find visualizing more difficult...

Basically this post is to defend myself. I am proving that im not mad, cars can be related to having faces. I have collected some evidence to support this theory:

This is an article explaning that cars are made to represent similar characteristics to human faces, which also leads us to give them personalities, such as friendly, aggressive, sad etc.

'It probably won’t come as a surprise that most people viewed cars as having faces. Nor that there was often agreement on the corresponding “personalities,” as with the “submissive and friendly” Nissan Micra pictured above. What was surprising to me, though, was that most people, including both men and women, seemed to agree on their preference. From the study:

…the better our subjects liked a car, the closer it matched the shape characteristics corresponding to high values of “power.” Thus, people seem to like mature, dominant, masculine, arrogant, angry-looking cars.'

http://artandperception.com/2008/09/car-face.html

Herbie ofcorse... need i say more



And a whole film based on cars with faces and personalities 'Cars' 2006, Disney Pixar Films



This sums it up perfectly i think:

Chicken or Egg?

I am going to settle this argument once and for all.

THE EGG CAME FIRST!

It's like saying what came first the foetus or the human? A person did not just suddenly appear in his/her mid 30's on the earth. It wasn't a click of the fingers and a person appeared. Things have to grow somwhere, eggs and sperm, all that jazz. So the egg was obviously first, then it grew into a chicken.

'Oh, well where did the egg come from?' you may ask: probably a similar animal to the chicken. It just evolved into the chicken. What came first the ape or the human? The human evolved over time, just like the chicken would of. Come to think of it, the whole question 'what came first, the chicken or the egg?' is wrong. It's not taking the theory of evolution into account at all. Which has lead me to believe the saying was around before Charles Darwin.

Rare Coins

So, i've been doing a bit of a 'spring clean' during the summer. Amoung the many things i've held onto are some coins. I remember when i was around 11 my next door neighbours took my brother and myself to the Millenium Dome. When we were there we bought an ice cream and this man handed some change to me. He said hold on to that one (indicating to the 50p) because it will be worth around £10. So i did.

This 50p has dolphins on the back, which is why im guessing it's supposedly rare.



I've done some rare coin hunting and the highest it will get me so far is £2.95. But i did find one bid that has now dissapeared that was a whopping £6.99! I'm thinking if i hold on to it long enough, one day it might pay for my tuition fees.
I had some other 50p's i thought had the same 'rare factor' but thanks to wikipedia it turns out they're not http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fifty_pence_(British_coin)

Wrong Number

Even though neither person can see eachother in wrong number phone calls, it's still embarassing and awkward. You have to be overly polite and friendly 'No, i'm sorry but i think you may have the wrong number'. Really we mean 'Who the hell is that!?' or even just hang up.
I remember once having a wrong number call and after i'd done the 'No i'm sorry' line, they said 'Are you sure?'. Hmmmm... 'Yes, there's no John here'. And then they were so persistent i was asked to physically go check my own living room just to be sure John wasn't there. The worst bit is, i did!
It becomes quite hostile if they call a second time: now they're wasting my time and ignoring my previous, helpful information.'Same number, sorry', 'Oh is it? sorry about that.' Mmmm Well..yes, ofcorse it's the same bloody number DICK, you've just dialled exactly the same number and hoped somehow it would magically travel through the phone cabling to another destination.
My current home phone number recieves quite a few wrong number calls (just incase you didn't guess). They seem suprised when i say 'No, this isn't NatWest i'm afraid'. We must have one digit difference... not the worst place to have a similar phone number to however. Especially in these desperate times.

Belly Buttons

Innie or Outie? Outies mean your an alien...? Remember that theory? (i believe it was in an episode of Rugrats).

The belly button is a mysterious thing. Whilst it is a scar left behind from the umbilical cord, it's also a fashion icon, object of sexual fetishism and taboo area of the body.
Belly buttons have more uses than you'd think. They are not just a one trick ponies, they can be used as a way to distinguish between twins or they can be pierced or even this...

Grapes

There is an art to the eating of grapes. A recent conversation had me outcasted because i admitted to occasionally eating my grapes slightly different to what you'd expect. I was unaware that some people had never done this before.

When eating a grape (not everytime because thats too time consuming) thou should delicately remove the peel with thy teeth. This is the bitter part of the grape, once removed the sweetness of the grape can be fully enjoyed.

If you choose to then bite around the grape you will discover the centre section of the grape is much sweeter than the fleshy outer layer. This is where the grapes flavour and sweetness is hidden. Although, the pips are in this section which again taste bitter so try to ignore this...

If you've never done this then your missing out. I therefore have a superior knowledge of the grapes inner characteristics and should be respected and listened to. Not mocked. Check out the picture below, there is clearly a lot than can be learnt from the inner grape.

I'm not alone, there are many people that share this habit (knowledge). I know at least... 4.

Be Kind Rewind

I watched the film yesterday and thought it was genius. Not only the concept of 'Sweded' videos but the 'special effects'. I was trying to find clips of the creativity but came across a load of films made by 'real' people that have been 'Sweded' for a Be Kind Rewind Competition.

Here's a couple: Jurrasic Park



and Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory

Tea Making

How do you make the perfect cup of tea?
Teabag in whilst adding the milk? or teabag out then add the milk? I've even seen teabag in, then milk added before hot water!

Personally I take the teabag out before adding milk, it seems to clog up the whole tea making process otherwise. A recent debate left me in the minority group, more people added the milk before taking the teabag out.

Well i have done my research and can conclude that teabag out before milk is the correct and best tea making way as it allows the tea to brew properly thus increasing the flavour. If you add the milk whilst the teabag is still in the fat molecules in the milk clog up the teabag and prevent any further brewing.


Thankyou and goodnight.

Flooding

I don't understand why people buy houses in flood areas.
When there's heavy rain they still manage to act suprised when their ground floor becomes a pond and their belongings are floating away down the street. Surely you'd expect this if your living in the middle of a dried up lake?

Every year you see people on the news complaining about damage to their houses and what a terrible disaster this year has been. Well, why build a house ontop of a flood plain? Or better yet, why then buy one and live in it?
When people become stranded on there rooftops, i can't help but think - it's your own fault.

Lucky for them i have come up with a genuis plan to prevent such issues: The dinghy in the attic plan.
Every (floodrisk)home will have a dinghy in there attic. When such flood arises, a roof hatch/axe will allow the person to escape out onto the roof and set sail in there dinghy to safety.

Tada!

The Manthem

Another lyrical genius.

Toilet roll

This is one of my ultimate hates. Pure laziness.

The toilet roll has run out, some people don't even make the effort to change it but if you do manage PUT IT ON THE RIGHT WAY! It actually takes the same amount of time to put it on the correct way (crazy, i know).

My heart sinks when i find a toilet roll that spins the wrong way. It's just not right.

Football

As there's so much of it at the moment, it seems appropriate to write a blog about it.

So first of all, the people that are constantly blowing those horns throughout the whole match ruin my quality of life. If i happened to be sat near the guy, i would have to kill him.

Secondly, England are not going to win, but it's nice to be patriotic isnt it.

Thirdly, i know im not the only one to mistake a replay for a second goal.

Fourthly(?), i also know im not the only one to wait for others to cheer around me before i do - due to past mistakes. Such as mistaking a replay for a second goal or the ball looking as if it's gone in the net but really it's gone to the side which everyone else seems to know except me and my eyes.

Fifthly, as i watch a match i am constantly aware that i am female and will be judged by men as being a tomboy, lesbian or wag so must seem as femininely intellectual at all times to avoid such labels.

Come On England!